Death is a taboo subject when it comes to conversation,according to new research launched today.
The topic is the most avoided conversational item for around onein five people, the nationwide survey by Norwich Union reveals.
Women feel more at ease discussing it than men – althoughyoung people aged 16-24 believe talking about Tony Blair andpolitical issues is even MORE of a taboo subject than death.
The research also reveals:
- Death is seen as less of a taboo by the youngest (16-24) ANDoldest (65+) than all other age groups, while religion is thebiggest conversational taboo among 30-somethings
- Both death and sex are considered equally taboo subjects bywomen
- Death is seen as the biggest taboo by a quarter (24 per cent)of Londoners - far more than anywhere else in Britain, and
- People in the North West are the most likely to openly discussdeath – only 12 per cent of people asked described death asthe biggest taboo, fewer than anywhere else
Nearly half the people questioned (48 per cent) also said theywere treated differently by others after their friend or loved onedied – and 54 per cent said advice on how to support someonewho has suffered a bereavement would be useful.
The research is published to coincide with the announcement thatNorwich Union is to support Cruse Bereavement Care, the UK’slargest and only national organisation that helps and supports thebereaved.
Norwich Union is donating £90,000 to Cruse, allowing the charityto recruit a full-time member of staff and train 10 volunteers towork on its helpline and respond to calls. Norwich Union will alsogive a further £10,000 in sponsorship to the charity’spublication ‘Cruse News’.
David Czerwinski, of Norwich Union, said: “The OxfordEnglish Dictionary definition of taboo is something that’savoided or prohibited, especially by social custom – and thatcertainly seems to be the case when it comes to talking aboutdeath.
“Our research suggests that two out of every three peoplein the UK has lost either a close family member or a friend in thelast three years – yet as a nation we still find it extremelydifficult to discuss death, and cope with bereavement.
“With nearly a third of people feeling there isn’tadequate support in place for those who suffer bereavement,we’re delighted to be supporting Cruse Bereavement Care andhelping get their message across.”
The survey found that people are most likely to turn to familymembers after a bereavement, and that women are more likely to turnto girlfriends than men are to discuss it with their malecounterparts. Just six per cent of those questioned would turn to‘a religious leader’.
Asked what they needed most to help them through theirbereavement, 46 per cent said ‘someone to talk to’– while the equal second most popular answers were family andfriends; counselling and support; and to be left alone.
Anne Viney, spokesperson for Cruse, added: “Cruse providesadvice, counselling and information on practical matters forbereaved people entirely free of charge - last year over 107,000people sought help and support from us.
“Cruse is only able to offer its services freely due tothe generosity of individuals and grant-making bodies, andwe’re delighted to receive the support of Norwich Union.
“The research findings demonstrate that people clearlyfind death a taboo subject, whether it’s discussing it withothers or seeking help. Anyone who has suffered a bereavement andwants help can contact the Cruse helpline on 0870 1671677.”
More information and advice on dealing with bereavement isavailable at
www.crusebereavementcare.org.uk.
Death is Till a taboo sunject in britain
24 May 2011
Death remains a taboo subject in Britain, according to new research commissioned by the Dying Matters Coalition.
Although the majority of people think that talking about death is less of a taboo than it was 20 years ago, two-thirds of all people agree that people in Britain are uncomfortable discussing dying and death.
The research, which was released to coincide with the second annual Dying Matters Awareness Week (16-22 May 2011) finds few people have discussed with their partner the type of funeral they want (33%), whether they have a will (33%) where they would like to die (16%) or the type of care and support they would want at the end of their lives (18%). Women are a lot more likely than men to have had discussions with their parents, but both men and women are more likely to have spoken with their partner than their parents - just one in four people have spoken to their parents about whether they have made a will and only 11% have discussed with them where they would like to die.
- The research, which was carried out for the Dying Matters Coalition by Comres, reveals that although most people are scared of dying, quality of life is viewed as more important than how long we live for:
Just 15% of people would like to live forever and only 9% would like to live to over 100. The most common age at which people would like to die is aged 81-90 (27%). Younger people are more likely than older people to want to live forever.
More people are scared of dying in pain (83%) than of being told they are dying (67%), dying alone (62%) or dying in hospital (59%). Despite the economic downturn more people are scared of dying than of going bankrupt (41%) or losing their job (38%). Women say they are more scared of dying than men.
The older people get, the more likely they are to think that quality of life is more important than the age they live to, with 81% of people aged 65 or over saying this, compared with 58% of people aged 18-24.
The research also found the majority of people have used euphemisms as a way of avoiding using the words “death” and “dying” when talking about the death of someone they knew – the most common euphemisms are “passed away” (57%), “deceased” (23%) and “kicked the bucket” (20%). 17% had used the term “popped their clogs” and 10% used “brown bread”. One in five people don’t
think it’s appropriate to use euphemisms when talking about the death of someone they know.
Eve Richardson, Chief Executive of the National Council for Palliative Care and the Dying Matters Coalition, commented:
“Although someone in Britain dies every minute, our research has found that many people do all they can to avoid talking about dying. It’s encouraging that most people think talking about death is less of a taboo now than previously, but there is still a long way to go.
"That’s why we are running Dying Matters Awareness Week, with many coalition members holding events up and down the country. Unless we talk openly about dying and death we won’t be able to get the care and support we want, where we want it at the end of our lives.”
The survey also found that more than three-quarters of people (78%) think that it is part of a health professional’s job to talk to them about where they would like to be cared for when dying and where they would like to die. 14% think this should happen when you are healthy and well, 52% when you are diagnosed with a life limiting illness and 12% when you are very ill and close to dying.
Professor Mayur Lakhani, GP and Chair of the Dying Matters Coalition, said:
“As a practising GP I know that many people are frightened to talk about dying, but avoiding the subject is not in any of our interests. That’s why at Dying Matters we have been working with GPs to increase their confidence in talking with patients about end of life issues.
"The fact that our new research has found that most people would want a health professional to talk to them about end of life care is a positive step forward and shows that people do want more open and honest communication. We need to build on this and help more people have their wishes met.”
